Judi Dentures’ Bank Holiday Blowout: Facelifts, Flops and a Fallen Furry Icon
Alright my long-weekend lovelies, Judi Dentures is back, gin in hand and judgement fully chilled but still razor sharp.
It’s Bank Holiday Monday, which means two things: ITV is pretending it knows what fun looks like, and the nation is either sunburnt, hungover, or emotionally attached to a dog off the telly. Let’s wade through this week’s showbiz tat before the ice melts, shall we?
Anne Hathaway and the £0 facelift – pull tight, pray harder
So apparently all you need for a red carpet “facelift” is a comb, some pins, and the willingness to yank your temples back like you’re trying to hear gossip from across the room.
This viral hair hack – inspired by Miss Hathaway’s suspiciously lifted elegance – is giving “instant cheekbones” without the surgeon’s bill. Clever? Yes. Subtle? Debatable. Sustainable? Absolutely not if you fancy keeping your hairline where it currently lives.
Experts are already waving caution flags, warning of tension, breakage, and the slow but steady march towards traction alopecia. In other words: you might look snatched today, but tomorrow you’re Googling “how to regrow edges.” Judi says: lift your spirits, not your scalp.
The Sisterhood Code – silent, sacred, and slightly savage
Now this I love. Women across the UK communicating via nothing more than a glance, a brow raise, or that very specific “we need to leave immediately” eye contact. It’s basically telepathy, but with better eyeliner.
With Judi Love and Angela Scanlon decoding it all, the so-called “Sisterhood Code” is finally getting its moment. And rightly so – it’s saved more nights out than taxis ever have.
From rescuing strangers in dodgy conversations to backing someone up in the loo queue, it’s low-key solidarity at its finest. No hashtags, no fuss – just vibes and mutual understanding. Frankly, more reliable than half your group chat.
To see The Sisterhood Code in action with Angela and Judi, visit https://www.maltesers.co.uk/sisterhood-code
ITV’s weekend telly – beige, but make it plentiful
ITV has rolled out a buffet of weekend morning shows so gentle they could double as sedation.
We’ve got Clodagh McKenna cooking in a picturesque dream, Ainsley Harriott doing his usual joyful seasoning of everything, and Gary Barlow sipping wine in New Zealand like a man who’s never had a bad day.
Add in Fern Britton at the vets and Dermot O’Leary wandering Ireland with heartfelt nostalgia, and you’ve got a line-up that screams “pleasant.” Not thrilling. Not groundbreaking. Just… pleasant.
It’s the televisual equivalent of a warm scone. Comforting, harmless, and you’ll forget it immediately after consuming.
Gibson goes global with Monster move
Now for something actually quite cool – Gibson has snapped up Monster from Mayday as an ambassador, and honestly, about time.
Dubbed the Beatles of the Chinese-speaking world (no pressure, darling), Mayday have been quietly dominating with stadium tours that would make Western acts weep into their tour buses.
And Monster’s new signature guitars? Very slick, very collectible, very “I will never afford this but I respect it.”
It’s a reminder that global music doesn’t start and end with the UK and US – even if our charts like to pretend otherwise.
Book of the Week – time travel, but make it prehistoric panic
Ominous Odyssey by J.T. Kelly drops a modern archaeologist into the Neanderthal era, which sounds like the worst gap year imaginable.
Our lad Amos goes from “I studied this” to “oh no, I’m living this” in record time, and suddenly intellect means nothing when you’re surrounded by people who could bench press you for fun.
It’s part thriller, part survival drama, with a dash of “why did you go into that cave alone, you absolute fool?” Not high art, but definitely high-stakes escapism. Pack snacks.
BBC Scotland – short form, big ambitions
BBC Scotland is leaning into short-form comedy like it’s the last train out of traditional TV town. Digital-first, bite-sized, and ready to be devoured between scrolling and snacks.
It’s a smart move – audiences aren’t sitting down for six-hour epics anymore, they want quick, sharp, shareable laughs. Think less “settle in,” more “watch while boiling the kettle.”
If the quality holds up, this could be a proper pipeline for new talent.
If not… well, at least it’ll be short.
SNL UK – finally finding its groove?
Saturday Night Live UK is stacking its host lineup with actual charisma – Hannah Waddingham, Ncuti Gatwa, and Aimee Lou Wood are all stepping up, which is a strong sign.
It’s taken a minute, but the show’s starting to feel less like an awkward import and more like something with its own identity.
Add in decent musical guests and a cast finding their rhythm, and we might actually have something here.
Cautiously optimistic, but Judi’s still keeping one lash firmly raised.
Katie Price – nothing to hide, everything to unpack
A new Sky documentary promises to go beyond the headlines and dig into the life of Katie Price. And honestly… where do you even start?
From Page 3 to reality TV chaos, bankruptcy to reinvention, she’s lived about six lifetimes in public.
This could be insightful, raw, and genuinely revealing… or it could be another spin on a story we already know too well.
The key will be honesty. Real honesty. Not just glossy reflection with sad music. Because if there’s one thing the public can spot, it’s when they’re being sold a “truth” with the edges sanded down.
Alex Albon – going slower to go faster (make it make sense)
Formula One, darling, where logic goes to stretch its legs. Albon’s insight that sometimes you have to slow down to be faster is either deeply philosophical or a cry for help.
The 2026 regulations have clearly turned driving into a mental chess game, with adaptability now the real superpower. It’s less “pedal to the metal” and more “strategic existential crisis at 200mph.”
Also, the idea that drivers are best mates off track and mortal enemies on it? Very drag brunch energy, honestly.
The full discussion is available on Up To Speed, which can be streamed now via Global Player and all major podcast platforms.
Farewell to Ted – the real star of the riverbank
And finally, a proper lump-in-the-throat moment. Ted, the beloved pooch from Mortimer and Whitehouse: Gone Fishing, has passed away.
Let’s be honest, Ted wasn’t just a dog – he was the dog. Stealing biscuits, pottering about, and quietly becoming the emotional glue of the show. Bob Mortimer and Paul Whitehouse’s tributes say it all – he was family.
In a world of loud, overproduced telly, Ted was a gentle, joyful presence. And yes, I am absolutely more emotional about this than some celebrity breakups.
Final thought
So, what have we learned this Bank Holiday? Don’t yank your hairline into next week, trust a woman’s side-eye over any app, ITV will always choose “pleasant” over “exciting,” and sometimes the biggest star on TV has four legs and a biscuit habit.
It’s been a week of quirks, comfort, and the occasional gut-punch – exactly how showbiz likes to keep us on our toes.
Now pour another gin (or a cup of tea if you’re a none-alcohol drinking good person), check your reflection (gently), and remember: if in doubt, just give the look.
The views expressed are those of the author and not ATV Today
